2nd posting - ORTHOOOOO!!!!

Alhamdulillah..praised be to Allah.. I managed to pass my medical posting well.. :) (maybe bole bg hadiah utk diri sendiri.. 4S maybe? hihi)

Now I'm in Ortho posting.. Seriously gonna miss my medical posting much.. Walaupon bz, penat, but I really enjoyed it.. Maybe because of working environment.. Surrounded by MO yg sgt sporting, boleh gosip2 ala2 kwn (tp kerja tetap dilakukan.hehe).. Mmg dah jatuh cinta ngan Medical.. InsyaAllah, will see medical again time MO nanti...hopefully.. ^_^

Owh..being in ortho posting, during my 1st day of tagging, dah masuk OT dah.. aduh.. memang x minat masuk OT dari dulu lg.. but i had to.. hehe 1st OT: Percutaneous tenostomy done for CTEV (club foot).. 2nd OT: Open Reduction & plating of Right Femur.. owh yg ni sgt lama..5 hours ++ lebih kurang.. waduh lenguhnya berdiri..tgn dh tremor akibat hypoglycemia..tp maintain je tkt kena tegur ngn specialist.. hehe Hopefully I can go thru this posting as well as my medical posting too... By hook or by crook, I have to fall in love with ortho so that I can enjoy my work mcm medical dulu2... hehe :)

Kadang2 kita selalu mengeluh kan, kenapa la Allah hilangkan matahari & turunkan hujan, tp bila kita sedar, rupa-rupanya Allah nak hadiahkan kita pelangi yang saaaangat indah... Oleh itu, bersyukurlah sentiasa...

Alhamdulillah... :))

Back to HTM

6th December 2011

Last night PM shift was uneventful.. Alhamdulillah.. I managed to sleep for 4 hours. Haha. Woke up at 5am, rushing to the female ward, went to the treatment room, and started my routine blood taking. Then, solat and went to the male ward, also doing blood taking. Managed to finish all the blood takings before 7 :)

Now I'm back to HTM. I'm so happy to meet all my friends here, and also my MOs. And of course, everyone kept asking me about that standard question,

"Camane kat HKB, bes ke? Dah jumpa someone?"

"Lamanya x nampak Dr Azra, kahwin ke hr tu?"

"Eh2, xde pape gosip ke kt HKB?"

Haha. Tengok, betapa mesranya semua orang. I only managed to smile. Not even answering the question. Hehe

.:HKB:.

Alhamdulillah, already finished my 1-month attachment there. Really learned a lot. Thanks to HTM because sending me there. At least I learned something. I managed to see many cardiac cases (in CCU/CRW for 2 weeks) & also cases that cant be managed in district (in HDW). I still remember my 1st day in CCU...

"Dr!! Ada patient VT!" I was like, 'huh? what to do?'

"Dr, defib la cepat" (ayoo..x pernah defib seumur hidup)

Yes, that was the true scenario. SVT, VT, complete heart block, ACS (STEMI, NSTEMI, UA), any many more.. Really enjoyed it! Dr Azerin (Consultant Cardiologist) was super duper hebat & byk mengajar, Kak Tiqah (MO medical) sgt2 helpful. really adore her. ;)

In HDW, most of the patients were on ventilator. Yes, during my 1st day there, I felt so bored. No one to talk to. Patients- mute (sedated). Also, I learned lots of things. I learned to do short line CVP, arterial line (for invasive BP monitoring), lumbar puncture, chest tube anterior approach (mcm sgt scary), tgk camane nak pasang transcutaneous & transvenous pacemaker, and many2 more.. PM shift kt HKB lak suuusah nk rileks..kol 4 am dah kena bgn utk blood taking.. hehe

overall, best kat HKB coz banyak sgt procedures, can see many cases, can learn lots of thing. but cons nya sy x ramai kwn cam kat HTM.. kat HTM kan kecik je, leh kenal everyone kat other department kot (mostly ler).. :)

7th December 2011

My 2nd EL today... Sorry my colleagues, cant go to work today.. MY tummy buat problem.. T_T Esok insyaAllah leh pegi kije blk..Ameen :))

Maha Melihat

I really love this song.. Sayu je.. Muziknya.. Liriknya.. Huhu..

I think I'm no longer myself these days..

Should I just pasrah & redha je?

T_T

Is it true?

Is it true that time heals all wounds?

Some people say,
“Just sit back and in time you’ll no longer have the sadness, anguish, yearning, guilt, anger & fear you’re feeling now. They’ll fade away, and you’ll be fine.”

But how long is sometime?
1 year? 2 years? or lifetime?

Please, please, please.. Enough with all of these..

Because I'm really, really sick...

A Broken Heart

Today I am off after a hectic PM shift last night..

Hurm.. I became a little bit emotional lately..especially when I heard love songs at the radio.. I'm heart broken.. I'm trying hard not to cry, holding up breaths, but I fail. Tears coming out, out of my intention, and it just couldnt stop...

I'm trying very hard to forget him, to forget all the memories we had together before. But why it seems so hard? The memories kept playing inside my head like I turn on the television, put the CD inside, and watch the movie. Yes, it is very difficult for me to accept the truth. The truth that we cant be together just because of lame reason (which I cant jot it down here). To deal with the truth, like no more text messages, no more phone calls, no more skypes, no more good morning & good night wishes.. Luckily I dont turn into a depressed state (Nauzubillah)

I google to look for 'how to deal with a broken heart'. I read articles here and there. I try to listen to many advices. But I tell you. Its not easy. Yes. its not easy. But, when I think back, till when should I be like this? Crying and crying for no reason, while he is living happily there & dont ever think of me pon. Huhu

Heartbreak is painful. Very painful.

But, I'm very lucky to have supportive family. I dont know what will happen to me without them. I'll always pray and I believe that Allah always gives us back what he'd taken, InsyaAllah..

And I'm going to move forward. I will always pray for his happiness, and may he be happy for what he had chosen. Thanks for all the memories, thanks for all the times U had spent with me before. I'll always remember U in my du'a InsyaAllah...

My first pleural tapping! :D

Alhamdulillah.. 1 more achievement today..
Did pleural tapping for the 1st time today, n Alhamdulillah, it all went well..
Syringed out about 1.5 L of pleural fluid, straw-colored..
Memang rasa takut sangat before 'cucuk' tu..
Rasa hepi bila tengok ada 'backflow' kat branula tu..
Alhamdulillah.. :))

Salam AidilAdha everyone!
Jangan makan daging lembu banyak sangat yer :D

2nd November 2011

Hari ini terasa bahagia. Hepi. Alhamdulillah.. :) Dah lama tak rasa bahagia macam ni, lebih2 lagi dengan apa yang terjadi akhir2 ini. Tabahkan dirimu wahai Zaitul! :)

Next week saya akan ke HRPZ for CCU & HDW attachments. Macam2 perasaan ada. Berdebar+ excited+ takut. Mampu ke saya manage patients2 yang bertimbun di sana tu? Di HTM, patients mungkin x seramai di HRPZ, tu pun saya dah merasa penat. Tapi saya hepi. Hepi bekerja di bawah MO2 yang baik. Oh ya, HOD saya dah resign KKM. Dah join HUSM as lecturer. Dr Sanihah, I wish U best of luck and we surely gonna miss U! For sure saya juga akan merindui rakan2 di HTM yang best & gila2 tu bila ke HRPZ nanti (ala,sebulan je pon :p) Haha, especially time ramai2 melepak di bilik HO oncall yang amat sempit itu & bergelak ketawa sakan. Saya le yang paling banyak kena kacau :p

Erm.. Sedar x sedar, dah 25 dah umur saya. Dah tua x? Hehe Hepi tengok kawan2 yang sudah ada family sendiri. Saya bila lagi? Haha. Mungkin belum tiba masanya lagi & saya sentiasa mendoakan agar Allah memudahkan jodoh saya, Ameen..ameen..ameen.. :) Tahun ni celebrate birthday ngan colleagues di HTM je, ramai pulak yang birthdaynya bulan 10. So, kitorang share beli cake & celebrate kecil2an, ngan nurse. Hehe. Hadiah? Saya beli untuk diri sendiri je, guna duit 1st gaji saya :)

Oh ya, 11.11.11 ni BFF saya akan mendirikan rumah tangga. Sooo happy for her. Tapi at the same time, saya rasa sayu, sayu yang amat, nanti mesti dah susah nak jumpa dia because she will stay at Setiu ikut suaminya :( huhu last week, time tidur rumah dia, saya & dia ber'pillow talk' until late at night, sampai saya terburu2 bangun pagi tu pergi kerja, lambat! Haha. I'm gonna miss U Nurul Atiqah Awang Lah! Thanks for being me time ups & downs, and lending me your shoulder to cry on.. :)


Oh, tak lupa, sejak akhir2 ini, saya juga amat merindui rakan2 UIA saya. Saya rindu segalanya. Saya rindu Kuantan & tempat2nya. Saya rindu nak pergi Teluk Cempedak, Tanjung Lumpur, makan ikan bakar di sana, SaraThai & semuanyalah. For sure saya akan menitiskan air mata bila ke sana lagi. Full of memories! Huhu T_T

Erm..esok hari Khamis, 6 Zulhijjah kan? Jom pakat2 puasa jom :))

p.s: kenapa saya makin gemok sejak jadi HO ni? sob3... :((